Site News

Thanks to zax827 for the heads-up that our chat rooms disappeared for most of our members! Since I wasn't affected, I didn't see it, though I wondered why it had gotten so quiet. 😀

It looks like only staff members can access the chat at the moment. I wrote the providers of our chat rooms and discussion boards to ask what happened. I'm sorry for the interruption; in the meantime, the conversations are still going on. Hope you can connect with like-minded friends there and get back to live chat with them soon.

Jeff

I made some updates to the site which broke access to everyone's messages today. I fixed the problem, and you should be able to see your inbox again. Let us know if you still can't get in.

Thanks for your patience!
Jeff

Once Up A Time, OlderGay.Men had an account on Facebook. We posted updates there and replied to Facebook users' questions. Five years ago, questions arose about whether Facebook was a healthy place to be. I effectively closed my personal account after a final straw and deleted OlderGay.Men's presence there.

We did continue on Twitter, but it looks like that's coming to an end as well, at least for now. We've been receiving notices for weeks from Front, the company that helps us track problems for our members, that they're removing Twitter as a communications channel because Twitter is increasing the cost of API access beyond what they can support. In recent days, Twitter notified us that we could no longer...

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You'll now see a "What's New" button at the top of each page that will pop in a window into some of what's happening around the site. Hope it helps you find even more friends and fun.

Jeff

I added two new categories to our discussion boards:

1. Sex
2. Personal Ads

I wrote something about the rationale for each in the "About This Category" notes at the tops of the sections. Basically, there are a lot of posts that fall into these two categories, and I thought that putting them together would help prevent them from overwhelming other topics without stifling discussion. If you want to be a moderator and help move new posts to the right place, just let me know!

Jeff

If you're a regular user of OlderGay.Men, I'm sure you've noticed much amiss lately. I've made some upgrades in the last couple of weeks which fixed many things and broke others, so I fixed those problems, each of which spawned two more, and...

I just wanted to pop in and reassure you that I'm more aware of it all than you are. 😄 I thought I had the worst annoyances under control before I went on a trip, but there were problems my tests didn't catch, and the whole cycle fired up again. I worked on it as I could, and I'm devoting more time to it now that I'm home.

I delayed posting this, waiting until I was sure the newsletter was reliable again so this would reach everyone. I'm sorry I waited; I'm glad if you're seeing it now. While you wait for full service to resume, you can drop in to the live chat system we're trying out. You'll find me there cursing with updates about the latest inscrutable bug.

As always, the good...

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I've been updating our Patreon members on what's been happening with me, and thought I should post a quick note to bring everyone up to speed.

After my partner died in February, I moved to Fort Lauderdale, Florida. It was sudden, but there was nothing keeping me in Maryland, and I took advantage when a furnished apartment became available the first of March. I lived there for two months, and bought a house last Wednesday.

It's an odd place, with character bordering on — and sometimes tipping into — eccentricity. It needs a great deal of planning and work, and will be a fun project and, in the end, a welcoming get-a-way for friends visiting FL. Most importantly, the cat's happy to have his own yard again.

All of which is to say I've been offline more than usual. Settling Al's affairs, moving, setting up house, looking at and bidding on houses, moving again, tearing down a wall… Life's been further up in the...

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OlderGay.Men member Loren Olson will be traveling over the next two months to promote his new book No More Neckties, a memoir of growing up gay in the 1950s and 60s, coming out late in life, moving to the country, and starting a farm with his partner.

If you'd like to come out and support him, you can see if he's coming to your area in the travel plans on his profile and read more about his work on his website.

Lucas Prieto, a doctoral candidate at Michigan State University in the School of Social Work, is seeking gay men 50 years and older in the American Midwest to take part in a survey regarding sexual satisfaction, aging, and health. The study consists of a brief online confidential survey that takes 15 to 20 minutes to complete. Topics range from ageism within the gay community to sexual satisfaction, erectile function, and general health questions. If you would like to participate or know anyone who may be interested, you can learn more at:

https://lucasreyesprieto.wixsite.com/survey/

And read an interview with Lucas here:

https://pridesource.com/article/gay-sex-after-50-msu-researcher-on-a-mission-to-normalize-promote-sex-at-all-ages/

My partner Al died Tuesday morning. He went through two more hospitalizations since this all started in October, and the second was a particularly rough stay. Because of COVID restrictions, he had to sit alone in a room for twelve days. That's disorienting for anyone, but at 84, it really knocked him for a loop.

He came home a week ago today. We had a hospital bed and oxygen ready for him, and after sleeping most of a day, he came around and was more like himself. But he still couldn't catch his breath. I learned to grab bits of sleep when I could, since he got me up several times a night. The last night, he couldn't stay in the bed anymore and couldn't even lie back in the recliner. I took the bed next to him, and he sat up, trying to find a position that worked. Around 6:30 in the morning, his breathing took on a gargling sound, and then he stopped responding to me. I called his adopted son next...

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